"I Can't Worship"

“I wasn’t able to worship because…” I have been on the receiving end of more than one post-service statement, or email beginning with this sentence in my life. I know that I have to settle some things about what I believe and how I will respond ahead of time, because in the moment - depending on the state of my own heart - these statements can make me angry, sad, self-pitying, dismissive, belittling, and unkind, or they can be an opportunity to further and clearly shepherd those I’ve been called to serve - including myself!

First I need to settle that this statement from a theological perspective is untrue. No one is ever not worshiping. Worship does not turn on and off like a light switch, worship is either rightly aimed at God, or it is bent in on self. And unless God reveals himself, we are all incapable of right worship. But as worship leaders, we know that people can easily shorthand ‘worship,’ for the sung worship portion of a Sunday gathering. And so often what people mean when they say they ‘can’t worship,’ is that something in the gathering was not to their preference.

Preference plays a role for everyone in our congregation - even for those of us who are leading worship, building the liturgy, and executing the service. Sung worship is participatory in a way that other aspects of our gathering are not. And I have noticed throughout the years, this seems to give people the freedom to speak to what they like and do not like more than other elements of a church or service. Music engages our minds, our hearts, our emotions, and our experiences - so we can quickly make preference a gospel issue when certain songs, styles, and aesthetic choices have been so deeply a part of our faith journey.

I consider the source. I have said regularly when it comes to feedback of any variety, the seriousness of which I receive, weigh, and implement feedback is: first, the staff and elders, second, anyone who serves on the worship team, third, the congregation. This is not to say that anyone is more valuable or important than any other - but staff, elders, and people who serve on the team are often more aware of what we are trying to accomplish. We are all on the same team and pulling in the same direction. Their feedback is most helpful if/when they sense we are drifting from the stated direction.

Do not take it personally. This is incredibly difficult for me. I deeply care about the work that I do, and it is hard to untangle my identity, my calling, and my vocation with enough distance to not feel like these kinds of statements are not a value judgment of me as a person. Everyone has an opinion, some people feel compelled to share theirs…

Because there is only one mediator between God and men - the man Christ Jesus - there is no song, style, or preference that can thwart true worship. True and right worship is only accomplished as God reveals himself and we respond - yes, in song - but also in all of life.

When Others Don't Feel Like Serving

Last week I wrote about serving when you don’t feel like it. But what about when people serving alongside of you do not feel like serving? Part of leading is shepherding your own team members off the platform to an even deeper degree than the leading you do from the platform in song, word, and liturgy.

Every person is unique, every circumstance different, but here are six considerations when it comes to walking with a team member who doesn’t feel like serving:

What is at the bottom. Is this a one off? A rough rehearsal? Conflict with a team member, the church, or in their personal life? Is this a reoccurring pattern?

Finding and reevaluating rhythms. My current expectation with the team I lead is that everyone is available at least twice a month. That does not mean they will necessarily be scheduled twice a month, just that I want them to be available twice a month. But when I audition new members, and communicate with regular team members - I communicate my expectation and ask, ‘How often would you be willing or interested to serve?’ Finding rhythms that are workable for our team expectation and the individual team members has been incredibly helpful for me in scheduling, as well as correcting my expectation of the team members.

Regular communication. Regular communication rhythms like feedback loops, and annual touchpoints or reviews can be helpful. But so can general conversation with your team members - ‘How is work? What do you have coming up this Summer? How is your family? Is this rhythm of serving still working for you? Do you need to take some time off? How can I pray for you? What does support look like for you in this next season?’

Know your people. One of the things that has been so helpful for me in learning the Enneagram is that I have a recognition that not everyone sees the world as I do. I don’t need to type every person I know how to know how to interact with them, but acknowledging that not everyone acts, behaves, or is motivated in the same way I am frees me to not expect from people to be anything or anyone other than themselves.

Time off. Maybe you have been on the receiving end of the dreaded, ‘I just can’t serve anymore,’ conversation. In my experience, these conversations usually reveal deeper (and often unrelated) issues. If you are having people express burnout, invite them to take time off rather than quit altogether. I would much rather be down a team member for a few weeks or months than loose a team member permanently.

Model what you want. When we gather to pray, I will often confess in my prayers how my heart feels scattered, and my affections are splintered, asking God to unite my heart, and our team to serve him and his people. I want my people to know they are safe with me, and can be honest and vulnerable - that does not scare me, and certainly doesn’t scary the God who knows us better than we know ourselves.

How about you?

How might you encourage a team member who doesn’t feel like serving?

Hidden Visibility

In one of the churches of my youth, our Worship Pastor was classically trained. He could lead a band, conduct an orchestra, and direct a choir. He did not lead from an instrument, and truthfully, very rarely did he lead vocally. If you asked him, he likely would not have thought he was a brilliant vocalist. Most Sundays there was a small choir, a piano-driven band, and a handful of vocalists leading at the edge of the platform - and Steve off to the side, with a largely unoccupied microphone on a stand.

One of the things I have come to appreciate about Steve’s leadership as I have grown older is that when he led, he carried enough presence for the congregation to follow, without dominating the songs and setlist. He would give visual cues with his hands, raise his eyes, and turn toward the congregation when it was time to sing. But much of his leadership enabled the people of God to address ‘…one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord…’ (Ephesians 5:19).

When I began leading worship at our church in the United Kingdom, it took me - and them - months to learn the ebb and flow following one another. They would sing with such volume and confidence, and many times I would start to lead a song, but by the end of the song, they were leading me.

As production quality continues to increase across churches, as churches across denominational and cultural borders begin to look more alike, as backing tracks and strict time limits become more common, as congregations anticipate (or expect) their church worship teams and worship leaders look, sound, and lead like what they see online - some of the questions I am asking myself:

How can I lead with hidden visibility? Especially as someone who does lead from an instrument, who does lead vocally. I do not want the people I lead to observe my leadership as spectators but participate as worshipers. I want to lead with enough conviction, competence, and presence that people do not just think I am in my own ‘worship world.’ Nor do I want to lead as a performer or showman.

How am I encouraging increased ‘one-anothering’ in the corporate gathering? I do want to have so little margin, so little capacity for in-the-moment response that our services feel rigid. I do not want to be so visible - or so loud - that our congregation cannot hear the voices of the people of God as we sing to God or to one another.

As I think, pray, and plan for 2024 - Hidden Visibility is one of my goals.

19 November: Liturgy + Set List

• HOLY HOLY HOLY

  Call to Worship: Psalm 63:1-8

  God’s love is stronger than death, and better than life. That is reason to sing….

• ALL I HAVE IS CHRIST

• HOLY (JESUS YOU ARE)

  Sermon: Mark 12:28-34

  Scripture says ‘we love because He first loved us.’ You can only love to the degree you understand how deeply, truly, and completely you’ve been loved by God. You can only forgive to the degree you understand how deeply, truly, and completely you’ve been forgiven in Christ. You can only give of yourself to the degree to which you realize you have been given all things in Christ. Let’s sing about those truths together. Would you stand if you’re able…

• FORGIVEN FOREVER

• HOW DEEP THE FATHER’S LOVE FOR US

  Benediction

Scheduling a Team

If you are leading in a context where you have enough musicians to serve on a rotation, then considering how to schedule a team will become an increasingly more regular part of your weekly responsibilities gearing up for a weekend.

Of course, you need to think through the practicalities of how you communicate with a team. What kinds of rhythms and expectations to set with the team, you will also need to think through some of the intangibles.

Intangibles like:

What voices sound the best together?

What team members can complement one another’s style of playing?

How can I balance stronger musicians with less experienced musicians?

What are the rhythms for serving that work best in the lives of our team?

How will these songs work with the specific team that will be tasked with leading the setlist in a weekend?

As my team has grown, my month has a similar outline:

• Two weeks before a new month, I send my whole team an email letting them know to enter any blockout dates for weekends they will not be available to serve.

• I start listing out songs that I think will work with the sermon text, determine any new songs, and begin to get a 30,000-foot view of the services a month at a time. This helps me keep an eye out for things like Baptism, Communion, or special announcements that need to be included in our gathering and will shift the time, or amount of songs in a service.

• The week before a month begins I schedule my team via Planning Center. As people confirm or decline, I know there will be specific spots to fill, and as this happens I have a better sense of how to tailor the set list to fit the team.

• Every Tuesday I email the team who is serving to confirm for them the set list and song keys.

This pattern has taken time to develop, and in every place I have served as found a unique rhythm. Consistency is key in your scheduling and communication. But because people are not widgets, you have to invest time into being a student of your team, to serve them well in your scheduling.

If you’re looking for other resources for your team, you may find these posts helpful as well:

How to build a team without musicians.

A team of worship leaders.

Identifying and developing new leaders.

Making space for new leaders here and here.

Thoughts On Writing

It has been said, ‘Write what you know…’ or others have said, ‘I write so that I might know…’ There is no doubt that words are formative. As followers of Jesus, we should not be surprised about this because God spoke the world into existence with His words. Jesus is the Word made flesh who sustains the universe by the word of His power. And God has given us His Word through Scripture.

Words are important. And personally, I believe that writing is important. That even if you do not consider yourself a writer, there is value, benefit, and importance to writing in, and for your unique context. Yes, write songs, but also write liturgy. Write in the language of your people, write to stretch them and grow them, write so that the trues of Scripture, deep doctrine, and beautiful devotion may inhabit their hearts, minds, and lives.

When considering writing, here are a few things I believe are worth considering:

Write all the time. Writing doe not just have to be pen to paper, it can also be exploring good writing, filling your own heart, mind, and life with things that are good, beautiful, and true.

Keep writing. I use my iPhone Notes app constantly. Lines, lyrics, phrases. Maybe they will turn into something - like a song, a call to worship, a blog, a responsive reading, a prayer, or devotional writing. Maybe those words are just a place for me to make sense of my own heart, and pour out my own praise. But keeping a running list of words, phrases, or quotes that have impacted me, can often jump-start a more intentional or focused time of writing.

Consider the purpose. If it is a song - is this a corporate worship song, a song of personal devotion, or something just for fun? What is it that the people of God need to hear? What is it that I just need to be able to say to God - or that He wants to speak to me?

Where are the gaps? As I am trying to bridge Scripture, songs, and liturgy, what words will help paint a clearer picture of the truths we are declaring? Does that passage of Scripture, Song, or pre-written liturgy already exist? If not, how might I prayerfully, and intentionally allow God to shape my words to fill in the gaps?

Are you feeling a need, a conviction, or a desire to write? How might you bring those desires to the Lord and allow him to shape them to bless, serve, equip, and challenge you, and those you lead and serve?

Budgeting Before Need

Maybe this seems obvious, but budgeting is important - both in your life and also in your ministry. If you are leading worship as a volunteer, in a bi-vocational capacity, in a small church, or a church plant, you are likely reading this and thinking, ‘And what if I have no budget?’ I get it! I’ve been in those spaces too. Those are times when you have to be creative, and careful, and learn to appreciate what you do to keep your heart from being bitter or coveting the gear, budget, or ability to make regular repairs and upgrades like your neighbor.

If this is you - I have found the best way to budget is by maintaining what you have. Take care of your gear, put things away, wrap cables properly, and spend time maintaining and learning the ins and outs of what you have so that you can make repairs on your own as needed. Keep a running list of new pieces you’d like to add, and the order in which you think gear may need to be replaced. Keep an eye out for deals on used gear, but also places that may be offering special discounts or pricing.

The reality is whether a church has no available budget, or a modest budget for Worship Arts - the equipment needed for our area of ministry is so costly, even a modest budget can quickly be drained when a speaker goes out, or you need to replace a soundboard. I currently serve at a church that provides a modest annual budget and I have slowly been able to make updates and changes in the last few years I have served on staff. Selling old and unused gear gave me the ability to add ‘non-essentials,’ as a part of the equipment for our team.

In the same way that homeowners are encouraged to set aside money monthly to replace a roof or an air conditioning unit every ten years, if you are able to set aside money to go toward making updates to your equipment without draining other areas of ministry your team, and your church will be served well.

Lead Like Yourself

We all learn by imitation. And as we become comfortable and familiar with whatever we are doing, we slowly settle into our own rhythms. I think the same is true when it comes to leading worship.

There are some aspects of how I lead worship that I do from conviction - like saying ‘Let’s hear God call us to worship from His Word…’ rather than ‘Let me call us to worship…’ There are some things that I do when I lead worship that are about my personal preference - like changing the keys to easily flow from one song to the next without stopping. And as we train worship leaders, I think it is important to help them see the distinction - what is conviction (the how and why of what we do here), and what is personal preference (will look different depending on the leader and the team).

After helping to lay out the difference between conviction and personal preference, I often say to worship leaders - I want you to lead like yourself, not like me. I lead the way I do after many, many years of leading in various environments. I am not interested in making little versions of Aaron, but in helping develop worship leaders who can lead like themselves with clarity, and conviction - even if what they say, and how they lead looks different than the way I would lead.

Every one of us is seeking to imitate Christ. So the question shouldn’t be - how would Aaron lead in this environment - but how would Jesus lead in this environment. Lead like the Spirit of God inhabits you as a follower of Christ - because He does.

Making Space for New Leaders [Part 2]

My hope last week was to give a vision for why we should make space for new leaders. This week I hope to give a few practical steps about how we might make space for new leaders.

There is a training rhythm that I have seen repeated often across social media, it goes something like this:

1. I do, you watch, we talk

2. I do, you join, we talk

3. We do, we talk

4. You do, I join, we talk

5. You do, I watch, we talk

I think this is a healthy rhythm for developing worship leaders as well. Because leading worship can be complex - in its preparation as well as its execution - you want to make sure that these categories are true in your preparation and planning, in your leading from the platform, and in the normal rhythms of serving.

Preparation and Planning.

How do you build a set list? How do you schedule a team? What is the philosophy of worship? The smallest amount of my job is the most visible portion of my job. When you're training and developing new worship leaders, they need to know the thought process behind your song choice, the conversations you’re having with the pastor, and the way you prepare personally, spiritually, and practically for a rehearsal and for the weekend. Sound doesn’t just get set up, lyrics don’t automatically appear on the screens, and the team leading can’t just show up without knowing what music is on for the service. Do not just show the what, but the how and why behind what leads you into the weekend. For many of us, this will likely mean we need to do some work to articulate our auto-pilot decisions.

On the platform.

Leading worship requires trust. Trust is only developed over time. I find it helpful to have new leaders face be familiar with the congregation from the platform before they are responsible for leading a song or a service. Have the new leader accompany you over a few weeks playing and singing. Then after several weeks of leading in that way, ask them to lead a song - or a Scripture reading, prayer, or verbal transition. As they settle into that new rhythm, and the congregation becomes familiar with their leadership, have them lead everything with you accompanying their leadership. And finally, allow them to lead on their own with you leading from the congregation.

Leadership happens on and off the platform. If we truly desire to disciple, equip, and train others to lead, we must give them access to our lives, and every aspect of our leadership - not just the obvious places. Invite questions, ask questions. Listen, be interested. Create a safe place for mistakes. Be gracious. Give away authority. Invite collaboration. Die to yourself.

Lead Toward Need

There is a difference between a song leader, and a worship leader. Being a worship leader is primarily pastoral before it is musical. And the idea of pastoring is really about shepherding. Knowing, loving, caring, and providing for sheep.

Now, I’m not what you would call an ‘animal person.’ We don’t have a dog, and we were just barely persuaded to let our children use birthday money to buy fish. So I have no authority to speak to animal care. But I have learned as a parent caring for little humans that my children will be malformed if I give them whatever they want. I have to set and enforce loving boundaries for their good and ultimate joy.

If as a worship leader you see yourself as a shepherd of people, you will have to be comfortable with not giving the congregation everything they want, but leading them toward what they need. This is no small or simple task. It requires knowing your people, understanding your culture, and a willingness to learn, grow, and be attentive to the voice of the Holy Spirit as you lead. It means sometimes people will be unhappy with your leadership, and unhappy with your decisions. It means sometimes they will leave your team, or leave your church. But worship leaders are not jukeboxes or cruise directors. Nor are we dictators or tyrants. Our leadership should always lead to the flourishing of those under our care.

“But Jesus called them to him and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” - Matthew 20:25-28

We lead among, not over. We lead as sheep before we are shepherds. We lead as those whose convictions are firm, philosophy intentional, and heart-tender to the Lord and His people.

Good Friday

The Gospel is good news.

Good news that God saves sinners. Good news is that on the darkest day, God shines forth as the one who is good, and does good.

When God made the world, he called it good.

When God made humanity he called man very good.

And then He rested, having completed His work.

When Jesus remade humanity, he said it is finished.

He gave up His spirit and rested. Rested in His completed work. Rested in the love and joy of the Father. This same rest is offered to all who trust in Christ’s completed work on this Good Friday. This day that by any standard would be called evil, wicked, and fruitless. But not for a Good God. Not for the One who works all things together for good, and glory.

No one is good but God alone. And today on this Good Friday, we can again celebrate His goodness.

Judging The Service

It is very difficult to assess week to week if you are making progress. Because week-to-week evaluations can largely become asking the question ‘Did people respond the way we hoped or anticipated?’ If the primary purpose of the corporate gathering is for the spiritual formation of God’s people than we can only tell as we look back over months and years if we are making progress in the work that we feel called to do as worship leaders.

So how do we judge the service? Honestly, we can’t. I encourage a service evaluation. But ultimately, we aim for intentionality and consistency. We labor to build trust in and among our people so that as we stand in front of them and lead them in sung worship, that they feel safe, and trust that we will lead them to a good place.

Ultimately, as followers of Jesus, our main job is making disciples. And part of making disciples is realizing that discipleship is a lifelong work. It is slow, ongoing, and never ends. So rather than judging a result, we have to become comfortable with tension. We have to be comfortable in allowing the Spirit to guide us into using the best of what we can offer to do what only He can do - lead people to Jesus, and transform their lives.

Go slow. Be consistent. Formation takes eternity.