“I can’t worship…” If you’ve been leading worship for any length of time, you have probably heard that statement. But perhaps, you too have felt the same way. There are endless lists floating through my mind as I am leading worship - am I distracted? There are endless realities (and alternate realities) floating through my heart as I am leading - am I worn down, frustrated, hurt, steeling myself? Airtight theology is good, but it is of little use if we are not transformed by its presence in our lives. We can believe and teach that all of life is worship, and still struggle to ‘enter in’ to worship in this moment as we lead.
But what do we do in this moment when we are leading but in fact do not feel that we are able to worship?
Pray. Ask that God would unite your heart to fear his name (Psalm 86:11).
Think of the throne room of heaven. Day and night the saints and angels and living creatures never stop singing, saying, and shouting - the holiness, glory, and worth of God. This present reality will be an eternal reality for all who are in Christ. View the temporal in light of the eternal.
Think of my brothers and sisters around the world. We are a part of a diverse, global body of believers stretching through generations into eternity. We are caught up in a story larger than this moment, and many of our brothers and sisters face real and acute danger from their families, friends, neighbors, and governments for gathering with the people of God or professing faith in Christ at all. May the perseverance of the saints fuel your own perseverance.
Think of someone else worshiping. One of my youth pastors told a story about how when he would struggle to fully enter into worship, he would think of a specific family member (who expressed outright hostility toward faith in Christ) face down, arms raised in worship… The reality is this will one day be the posture of all people (Philippians 2), but does it stir your heart, does it fan the flame of wonder in you when you consider enemies becoming worshipers?
It is all normal. It is normal that some days our worship flows freely and easily - from a heart and cup that overflows. It is normal that some days our worship is labored and mismatched to the worth of the One whom we worship. Worship is costly, and Christ is worth the cost - press on.
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When you don’t feel like serving.